Becoming a healer is a profound journey, but taking on the role of a mentor adds an extra layer of responsibility. There are often unspoken expectations, some of which are realistic, while others can impose unrealistic ideals that dismiss our own human experiences. When I stepped into my leadership role, my belief was rooted in the idea that we are all equals. I saw myself as a humble sharer of wisdom, passing on what had been generously given to me. In my eyes, those seeking my guidance were on a similar path, having invested the same dedication and effort that I had to earn the privilege of being a medicine carrier. Every seeker, to me, was a brother or sister in search of guidance. I refrained from assuming an authoritative stance or elevating myself above others, because my healing journey had taught me that true equality reigns, with no one person superior to another. At the outset, my intentions were pure, and I held genuine faith in those who sought me out for mentorship. I was guided by beliefs that, in time, would impart invaluable, albeit painful, lessons. It wasn't until years later that my rose-tinted glasses were forcibly removed, leaving me gazing into an abyss of confusion. I was confronted with the harsh reality that not all healers bear the same intentions or motives for carrying the medicines, nor are they created equal. My own path to healing was an arduous process of relinquishing the identities I clung to, and shedding attachments to the tangible world as I knew it. By the conclusion of my personal odyssey, I had learned the art of detachment and unearthed what I deemed to be the ultimate truth about existence: that life's essence lies in connection, respect, and self-love. While I continued to grapple with lessons and healings, I had finally arrived at a juncture where I could hold space for others. I assisted them in navigating their own pain, leading them towards the possibility of finding happiness, joy, and purpose in life. Before I embraced the role of a medicine woman and Kambo Practitioner, I devoted three years to my own self-improvement. Three years marked by sobriety and an intimate exploration of my authentic self, beyond the layers of trauma and conditioned pain. My deepest aspiration was to share this profound healing with others, liberating them from the burdens of lifelong pain we all bear to varying degrees. The realization that some individuals bore the mantle of medicine for profit or to satiate egotistical power dynamics was profoundly disconcerting. In this regard, I was admittedly naive, but I came to understand, albeit through harsh lessons, that not every medicine carrier could be entrusted, and not all held the greater good at heart in their service. Even now, those who lack moral integrity, particularly self-appointed teachers who falter in looking within and doing the inner work to lead by example, continue to trigger me deeply. Witnessing individuals who profess to be guides and mentors, yet fall short in embodying the values they preach, strikes a chord within me. It's a poignant reminder of the responsibility that comes with assuming the role of a spiritual leader or mentor. Authenticity demands a rigorous process of introspection, an unflinching examination of one's flaws, and a willingness to confront and heal them. When these self-proclaimed teachers neglect this vital inner work, it raises questions about the authenticity of their teachings. How can one effectively guide others towards healing and growth when they themselves are unwilling to traverse the depths of their own psyche? The mentor-mentee relationship is a commitment that spans a lifetime, and it's one I hold with the utmost gravity while still permitting myself the right to my own human experiences that encompasses mistakes and follies as I dig deeper within myself for healing. After all, healers need healing too and we all are on a continual path to betterment!